THE MIRROR - Beliefs, Habits, & Stuff
Beliefs - You see what you are looking for. Once you develop a belief, you find what supports it. You will find stuff that is not even there to support your belief - STOP IT. We find ourselves constantly searching for information in our lives to validate the beliefs we have about ourselves. For example, if you believe you are a bad parent, you will look for various areas of your life to validate that belief. You will look at the laundry pile on the floor and validate the belief. You will look at the meal you prepared and think it could have been more nutritious, again you validate the belief. You will stare at your calendar and see that your day is overflowing with commitments, and think, "When can I make time for my family?" - and validate the belief. It is ok to have ambitions to be a super parent, but we must make room for the days when we fall short.
Honestly, we all control our own narrative. We are responsible for the story we are living. Sure, at some point in every human's life, we are dependent on others, but once the adult phase begins, we are solely responsible for how our lives turn out. Our narrative is the primary thing that we should always be working on. Revising, editing, deleting, and rearranging. Have some filler chapters, and even include an index if you want. Invite new characters in to your story and let some leave the story all together. The point is you are in charge, and you can rewrite your beliefs and your narrative. Rewrite the story you have been told to one that you can actually own and love!
At any moment, we can choose to write the next following sentence and change the story, the narrative, what we have been telling ourselves and others. James Clear stated in a recent email that to make changes, we must acknowledge the need to modify our environment so it no longer works against our own progress. He mentioned the comparison to stop swimming upstream. By changing our environment, we can support our goals and progress to achieve what we want. Modification of your environment can be very valuable and only needs to be done to support your goals and ambitions. An example of could be if you are trying to reduce or stop eating junk food, you must first keep it out of the house. By not buying or keeping junk food in the house you are modifying your environment.
Whenever we look at self growth and changing, we often to look at ways to support our motivation through micro habits and micro habits are truly effective because it's small changes that you can start doing every day however, one should be mindful that when you add something to your plate then you must grieve the loss of something else so for example, if you decide that you're gonna read 10 minutes before bed then with that reading, you're replacing what you were doing before maybe that was scrolling on social media before bed. Hence, it's essential to acknowledge the loss of what you're grieving and understand that there is not an infinite amount of time in a day; one must prioritize what is important to them to make sure they are most effective and focus on accomplishing their habits to cast votes to the identity that they want to be.
Habit helps us to create the identity we want. James Clear writes in his book that if we're going to identify in a certain way, we need to develop habits that shape our identity to align with it. For example, if you want to be bilingual, you should create a habit every day that builds on that identity. For example, I am learning Hindi, and for the past 18 months, I have had "HINDI " on my habit tracker as a way to study the language every single day. I am about 95% consistent with completing this habit. Some days I have a full one-hour session with my Hindi teacher, and other days I do homework or watch a Hindi show. The point is, I cast votes each day towards becoming a bilingual person.
We can change our beliefs at any time. We just need the courage to do so and the confidence in ourselves to unlearn what we have told ourselves is true for most of our lives. This is your invitation to take control of your own self-limiting thoughts and behaviors. Rise above the inner turmoil that limits you from achieving your full potential. You can break free from the chains that hold you back. The chains that anchor you to your most inauthentic self. You can change the lens through which you see the world. Ask yourself one question - Who do you talk to the most throughout your day? You might respond with my spouse, my mom, or even maybe my boss, but the person you speak to most every day is yourself.
At the end of the day, our beliefs shape the way we move through the world. They influence what we see, what we overlook, and what we assume to be true—even when it isn’t. When we cling to limiting beliefs about ourselves, we begin searching for evidence to validate them, often creating meaning where none exists. But the powerful truth is this: we are the authors of our own story. We hold the pen. We decide what gets revised, rewritten, or removed entirely.
Growth begins when we recognize that our narrative is not fixed. We can choose—at any moment—to write a different sentence, begin a new chapter, or shift the storyline altogether. That change becomes possible when we design our environment to support who we want to become and adopt habits that reflect the identity we’re building. Every small action is a vote for the person we want to be. And just as importantly, we must honor the reality that adding something new requires letting go of something old. Change always involves grief, but it also brings the opportunity for alignment and authenticity.
Your habits, your environment, your inner dialogue—they all work together to create a version of you that feels true and empowered. And the most influential voice in your life is your own. So speak to yourself with intention. Challenge the beliefs that shrink you. Release the narratives that were never yours to carry. And step confidently into the identity you are choosing—one that is shaped not by fear or self-doubt, but by clarity, courage, and compassion.
This is your invitation to rewrite your story. Make it one you are proud to live.
Disclaimer:
The content provided on this blog is for informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the guidance of your physician or other qualified health professionals with any questions you may have regarding your health or a medical condition. Never disregard or delay seeking professional medical advice based on information you have read here.
